May 18, 2004

Dazed Whiner

Our brainstormed youth drama concept has just been approved by the bosses. It is something to be proud of for me ‘coz the show we have in mind, while NOT a breakthrough concept is different from the usual crop. We want our youth show to be as real as possible – not pa-cute yet not soapish. Now if we can support that into writing or more importantly, if we can sustain that when the ratings come out, still remains to be seen. Based on my past mainstream TV/movie writing experience, the key is not to get too attached. Everything will all boil down to business eventually.

I’m still adjusting, of course. Yeah, I know I still have a lot of things to learn about good screenplay writing but more than this, I’m still adjusting to my new work. I got used to the fast-paced no-nonsense work of movie production I easily get irritated when we work in a snail and O.C. pace. I’m also still adjusting, not only to our head writer (I’m slowly getting comfy with him, not yet fully but getting there hopefully) but also to the other members of the creative team. I don’t know. Maybe it’s because my personality is just different from them. Or to use that hackneyed term again, we don’t share the same wavelength. I don’t know. I don’t really fit the typical writer image so maybe that’s another reason. Good thing my friend Emman is already part of the group. His presence makes it easier for me. Really!

Tomorrow, the team’s going to rest. This should have been good news since I’ve been working non-stop since last week (after the All My Life shoot wrapped up, I went straight to work for the youth show) and I’m down with cold and sore throat (must be the weather, or I’m really mentally and physically drained.) Yet, I’m not resting tomorrow coz I said yes to the movie writing offer. Michiko and I are going to meet to think of a storyline for the premise presented by the project’s film director. I’m not that confident with the premise but I don’t have the right to say that the premise sucks. I said yes to the offer which means I should work things out.

What’s bugging me is the fact that I’m accepting all these offers without understanding why I’m accepting them in the first place. I mean are these really what I want? Or am I just too hungry for money after a hard-up year? I don’t know. I still haven’t gotten to think things over. I really am clueless to what I’m doing. Totally clueless! Totally fucked up!

I wanna go home.


Anonymous said...

Hi Ted. Congratulations on making an important milestone on the youth drama concept! Naku... wouldn't it be cool if Carla ended up in that? [But that's a different topic. he-he!]

There's a lot to be said about working with people who are on different wavelengths. It would be really scary if you've got a group of creative people and they're all caught up in GroupThink.

As to accepting the offers without knowing why... you know what Maslow says about the Hierarchy of Needs, right? Before you can worry about self-actualization and limit yourself to working on the things that you're passionate about, you need to meet your basic needs first... such as food, shelter, and money.

Maybe rather than second-guessing your last two job decisions, you'll be better off accepting it as a given, and focusing all your emotional energy on making these two jobs your best, most professional projects yet.

Sorry ha... unsolicited advice, 'no? Can't help it kasi. Hahah!

~ CarlaFans

Anonymous said...

Hi Carla_Fans! Thanks for the words of wisdom. Easier said than done but can do. :D

Ey, just passed by your site and looked at the guestbook and saw a thank you note by Carla Humphries. Wow! :) Ang saya naman! :)

Anonymous said...

Yeah! That was a new post. Nagulat nga ako when I saw it eh. he-he! I hope it was really her! :)